alkontesa
07-11-2007, 03:12 AM
As how greatly the life gives us of disappointment and letting down, we let ourselves down before it does.. we do it behind faked masks of dignity, the situations honor and self-respect… while we are –at that moment- still searching of ourselves’ itself ..it’s like the covert negotiations to explore our existence inside the others…these the covert negotiations are run afoot and without leg…. what a dodgy we are!!
A great greeting, dear "ME"… yes, dear …. Though of all the tough words that you have sent out to me while I behave as ‘a human’!!... I’m not an angel as you try to impose upon me to believe in.. simply, I’m just a human!!!... I just realized that now.. after 27 years of fighting against myself to satisfy the others; parents, siblings, friends, relatives, mates, neighbors, customers, the people on the walkway, the taxi/bus drivers, sale-men, teachers, bosses,…. everyone and even everything… finally, I got nothing of most of them.. so why I should be an angel while the rest are devils??.. I won’t be a devil one day and even an angel.. I’ll be a human and only human..
Dear "ME", although of all that, I won’t eliminate you of my memory.. you know why? because you present the past of me .. and who doesn’t have a past won’t get a future…I’m now a wider minded women.. who doesn’t know evasive to please others.. Indeed I won’t forget you.. what I’m trying to do is to ignore anyone –embodied on you- affected me badly or even in a good way.. I’m just want to be myself as Allah created me…. Yes, a day I’ve said that I’ll get you out of my mind.. but you were confident I won’t.. you know I did that for reason of taking revenge of a part of my memory .. a part that denied .. feigned ignorance… or intend… to avoid me ‘ the real me’..
Dear "ME", I don’t want to walk among people wearing a faked face… I was –for all those I love- a huge memory of caring, offering, giving out, and honesty… I’m proud of myself because this who I’m… and never felt tired of doing this.. but I hate to feel I’m a mean.. I was –up to now and will be on- a mother, a sister and a friend.. I was all I could be… for that reason, I’m the most of those whom let down in this generation.. I accepted to be openhanded.. Thereupon, the life took from me more than I want to give it!!..[/SIZE]
A great greeting, dear "ME"… yes, dear …. Though of all the tough words that you have sent out to me while I behave as ‘a human’!!... I’m not an angel as you try to impose upon me to believe in.. simply, I’m just a human!!!... I just realized that now.. after 27 years of fighting against myself to satisfy the others; parents, siblings, friends, relatives, mates, neighbors, customers, the people on the walkway, the taxi/bus drivers, sale-men, teachers, bosses,…. everyone and even everything… finally, I got nothing of most of them.. so why I should be an angel while the rest are devils??.. I won’t be a devil one day and even an angel.. I’ll be a human and only human..
Dear "ME", although of all that, I won’t eliminate you of my memory.. you know why? because you present the past of me .. and who doesn’t have a past won’t get a future…I’m now a wider minded women.. who doesn’t know evasive to please others.. Indeed I won’t forget you.. what I’m trying to do is to ignore anyone –embodied on you- affected me badly or even in a good way.. I’m just want to be myself as Allah created me…. Yes, a day I’ve said that I’ll get you out of my mind.. but you were confident I won’t.. you know I did that for reason of taking revenge of a part of my memory .. a part that denied .. feigned ignorance… or intend… to avoid me ‘ the real me’..
Dear "ME", I don’t want to walk among people wearing a faked face… I was –for all those I love- a huge memory of caring, offering, giving out, and honesty… I’m proud of myself because this who I’m… and never felt tired of doing this.. but I hate to feel I’m a mean.. I was –up to now and will be on- a mother, a sister and a friend.. I was all I could be… for that reason, I’m the most of those whom let down in this generation.. I accepted to be openhanded.. Thereupon, the life took from me more than I want to give it!!..[/SIZE]